You simply have to ask the pertinent questions to see if there appear to be any issues or conflicts within the answers given. (I know it`s psych eval, but hey it`s your safety too)
You could build some experience by locating more experienced divers who do not have that paranoid issue of diving with "newbies". As an instructor, I feel it is partially my responsibility to dive with some less experienced divers, because a lot of others will not. Personally, I use the "I lead/You lead" so that a less experienced diver can have the control role of the dive, provided he/she is comfortable with that.
I always tell my students to feel free to hit me up for some diving. You simply can not work on being a good dive buddy if at least one of you isn`t already, and that first dive will say a lot!
You were brave to go on a dive date. That truly is a trust builder since each of you is responsible for the other`s life (so to speak).