I have the same issues too. The best way I have found is to relax when going down. I try to get off the boat first so I can take my time descending. I also try yawning when I can’t equalize. I used to get a bloody nose when I first learned to dive. I got them by blowing too hard when trying to equalize. (I had a really cute instructor and was always mortified when I would surface with a bloody mask).
I went to an Ear/Nose/Throat specialist. All they did was give me a decongestant med. The pharmacy messed up the label. It said ’Take 2 hours before DYING’! and one of the nurses told me to chew gum. Um, OK :)
Good luck and Happy Diving!