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#51828
How to Fail Your Open Water Checkout Dives
Greg - 12/07/2012 12:58 PM
Category: New Diver Q&A
Replies: 19

I saw this question and a few funny answers on Facebook and I thought I’d share here.


Various ways a scuba student can fail the open water checkout dives:



- Spit in your wet suit and pee in your mask.

- Bring a gun to class and ask the instructor if you can shoot it underwater.

- Smile wide and nod every time someone gives you the OK sign.

- Freak out and grab your inflator and your instructors inflator then proceed to inflate both BCs.

- Using your nose, snort the water out of your mask to clear it.

- Hand the instructor your snorkel when they give you the out-of-air signal.

- Switch from reg to snorkel during your descent.
#29
DeStoken - 12/07/2012 1:10 PM
LOL. This is really funny
#12093
Eric_R - 12/07/2012 7:02 PM
When the instructor gives you the stay together signal cross your legs.
#12093
Eric_R - 12/07/2012 7:03 PM
Put your tank on your bc upside down and run the reg hose between you legs.
#12093
Eric_R - 12/07/2012 7:06 PM
Use a keg of beer as a dive flag float.
#20357
LatitudeAdjustment - 12/08/2012 2:30 PM
"Spit in your wet suit and pee in your mask" Spitting in the instructors or DM’s mask is a good way to end the class or dive trip too!

Better pay attention in class, you can no longer get a c-card from StupidDiver.com, their site is gone :(
#4846
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Eve - 12/08/2012 5:30 PM
I like the comment from Progrower on bringing a blowup doll, kills 2 birds with one stone. : )
#1406
Green_Achers - 12/11/2012 4:51 PM
-Using 24 lbs of styrofoam for weight!
#51828
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Greg - 12/11/2012 6:20 PM
From Green_Achers: -Using 24 lbs of styrofoam for weight!...
Considering that 24 lbs of styrofoam is over 30 cubic feet in volume, you will be over 1900 lbs more lbs buoyant in salt water. That’s one heck of a life vest.
#46
leomillan - 12/18/2012 12:07 PM
I think the block of styro w/1900 lb buoyancy is called a "vessel"!
#97
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Xring0 - 12/18/2012 2:34 PM
When instructed to remove your mask and continue to breathe through your regulator, suck water in through your nose, panic, thrash around and hit your assigned dive partner in the head with your tank.

My daughter’s assigned dive partner did this on their final dive.
(notice the presence of the word "Assigned" and the absence of the word "Buddy")
#30
divebum - 12/18/2012 3:06 PM
soo funny, hog your buddy tight
#1328
Lonefrogman - 12/26/2012 5:49 AM
Drown
#1406
Green_Achers - 1/12/2013 8:52 PM
Complaining to your instructor that 3000 lbs of air is impossible to pick up!
#1406
Green_Achers - 1/28/2013 6:05 PM
Bring shark chum.
#27
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CrazyMike - 2/18/2013 1:45 PM
when the instructor is demonstrating the tired diver swim (foot on shoulder method) using you as the tired diver tell him im sorry im cold then pee
#121
Skjamdive - 11/22/2013 6:15 AM
I’m so glad I joined dive buddy. Where else would some one want to pee in my mask?!?!?! Lol
#2079
Subscribed
rashley - 2/12/2014 7:37 PM
Put your first stage on your K valve backwards with the screw going into the air orfice. I have seen that too many times at the pool.
#66
Subscribed
pogiguy2009 - 5/04/2014 11:33 AM
During dive reach over and turn off instructors air then give the OOA signal to him/her